It happens almost every time.
I post something beautiful—maybe something sensual, maybe something vulnerable, maybe something that just feels like me—and in the moments that follow, I feel amazing. Euphoric, even. Like I’m floating.
My heart races, I check the comments, I feel the warmth of connection. People see me, respond to me, reflect something back. That feedback loop of likes, DMs, and kind words is a rush—a hit of validation that lands straight in the soul.
But then…
The crash.
It doesn’t happen right away. It sneaks in, soft at first. Maybe it starts with a lull in notifications. Maybe I realize someone I hoped would say something… hasn’t. Or maybe it’s just the quiet. And suddenly, I feel it: that drop.
The dopamine is gone. The adrenaline fades. And what’s left is this strange hollowness.
I start to overthink. Was that caption too much? Did I share too openly? Was the image too sexy? Not sexy enough? I start scrolling again—not to connect, but to cope.
This is the part no one really talks about. That confusing space between the beauty of self-expression and the vulnerability that comes with being truly seen.
But I’ve learned to name it now: It’s the crash.
It’s not a sign that I shouldn’t have shared. It’s not a sign that what I posted wasn’t worth it. It’s just chemistry. The rise and fall of my nervous system trying to make sense of showing up so fully.
So now, when the crash comes, I try to be gentler with myself. I step away. I breathe. I remind myself that I didn’t post for the algorithm—I posted for me. And that is still sacred.
If you’ve ever felt this way too—if you’ve ever posted something you loved and then felt a little lost afterward—you are not broken.
You’re human.
Sensitive. Brave. And deeply, beautifully alive.
Love, Rissa
💜